Hanssie: In The In Between ~ A Kiss & Tell About The Journey Of A Suddenly Single Gal In Life, Love & Photography »

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Hanssie: In The In Between ~ A Kiss & Tell About The Journey Of A Suddenly Single Gal In Life, Love & Photography bio picture
  • Hanssie: Photographer, Mama, Diva, Single Gal, Shopaholic, Control Freak, Gym Rat, Cynic, Socialite, Daughter, Friend, Marketer, Asian, Consultant, Party Animal, Pescatarian, Grammar Fiend, The Queen of Everything.

    Labels. No matter how much we want to shy away from them, it’s a way of life. Collectively, they help us define who we are and separately, they each contain a snippet of a facet of our lives and personalities.

    When I first started my photography business, my logo was hanssie trainor: photography. Even back then I knew I could not be contained under one label, hence the colon. (The colon is used before a list or an explanation that is preceded by a clause that can stand by itself) and I knew that photography was just one thing that defined who I was. And now after 3+ years in the business, I’ve evolved and come full circle, back to using the colon to help define who I am – a multi faceted, ever changing person, that wears many hats and has many life experiences.

    This blog has always been about my life but with a focus on my photography, but now, there will be a shift to focus more on my journey in the "IN BETWEEN" from my former life as a wife and mother to life as a single gal and single mom living life passionately under my own terms with photography thrown in as well. I'm just a girl trying to figure things out and deal with baggage and confusion in the dating world. I'm putting it all out there --the good, the bad and the ugly. I hope you’ll join me for the ride.

    I'm kissing a lot of frogs..and blogging about it.

    (P.S. Yes, I am still commissioning for fashion/editorial work and for weddings/ portraits)

    ♥♥♥Hanssie♥♥♥♥
    951.264.1710

    "A girl should be two things: classy and fabulous." Coco Chanel

Ignorance May Be Bliss, But I Still Have to Put Up With Your Bullsh*t

I encountered a horrible man this morning while walking the dog. I’m in NorCal visiting my parents for Chinese New Year and this morning, following my normal routine, I took Goliath for a walk. Now, I am going to admit that Goliath is a menacing looking dog. He’s 90lbs, all black and his sheer size is intimidating. In his mind though, he is a 15lb puppy. He is excited about playing and loves other dogs. He is so unaware of his sheer size that he gets intimidated by big dogs, so much so, that he has to be put in the medium dog play room at day care.

So, on our walk, we encounter another dog walker with a small lapdog. He moves to give me a wide berth, as most people do when seeing a dog of Goliath’s size. Goliath, though, wanted to say hi to his dog and tried to pull me over. The man, freaks out and tries to yank his dog away from us, stumbling in the process.

As I go to apologize and ask if he is ok, the man starts cussing me out, calling me names and ending with the famous, “You’ll hear from my lawyer!” line and walks away. As I start walking back toward my parents’ house, I’ve noticed that he’s waiting for me around the corner. He is demanding to know where I live. Um, okay, like I’m going to tell you that you, Creeper. So, proceeds a 45 minute ordeal of the man following me and yelling at me, trying to find out where I live.

First, he throws out the veteran card. “I’m a vet…I fought in the war.” Now, if you know me, you’ll know that I have the highest respect for those that serve and have served our country. I grew up across the street from a man who fought in Pearl Harbor and I would walk to his little house every day and listen to his stories, practice typing on their new word processor and learn how to garden from his wife. The funny/sad thing is though, the only three times in my life where I’ve encountered blatant racism, was from vets.

Yes, this man, made the comment, “You Asians think you own everything around here.” Any time someone starts a phrase with,” You people…” it’s just not going to be a good thought. He proceeds to tell me, in the middle of the street mind you, that my “people” spit on him when he came back from the war, and this and that. This is where I finally stopped being respectful and started baring my teeth. I unequivocally told this man that he was ignorant and a bully and there was no way on Earth I was going to have him follow me home because I’m not an idiot. Oh, and I certainly have never spit on anyone in my life. Then I thanked him for serving OUR country.

He continued to follow me, told me to call the police then if I didn’t like it. Now, most people would’ve called the police. I am in the mindset that this was stupid, policemen have way better things to deal with than a situation where a grown man couldn’t act like an adult. Unless he posed a threat to me, I wasn’t going to bother the police.

I weighed my options. I could either out run him in my pj’s and flip flops, to which my pride said, “Hell no, you don’t run from bullies,” or figure out a mediator, not the police, to get this man away from me. I tried to get a man sitting in his truck to get the guy off of me, but this grumpy old man apparently is a well known complainer in the neighborhood. So, I went to the leasing office. Luckily, the office manager was right there. She listen to my story, she recognized the man, and I told her I didn’t want him following me home, because “That’s creepy and I have a daughter…” Yep, threw that one in there. I know when to show my cards.

She made him stay away while I walked away, but who knows, I’m not going to put it past him that he’s just lurking around somewhere waiting to see which house I get out of.

My favorite line of the day, which still makes me laugh to think of it, was, “Sir,” (and yes, I called him, ‘Sir’ the entire ordeal, because I do believe in being respectful–minus the part I called him an “ignorant a*hole and possible pedophile”) “I am not going to allow you to follow me home. How do I know you’re not a rapist?” To which he replied “Don’t flatter yourself. You’re not all that.

So, not only do “my people” act like we own the place, I should wear makeup when I take the dog out for a walk. Lesson learned.

 

Katie - January 31, 2014 - 11:11 am

WHOA. Just, WHOA.

And girl who wouldn’t want to get in bed with you… just saying.

The One Who Was the President…of DBs

The other night I was at a party for work when I met the President DB (and by DB, I mean, Douche Bag, just to be clear). And, if you’ve read this blog in the past, you’ll recognize that I run into a long line of DB’s while I’m out and about. It’s not wonder I’ve been playing hermit in my apartment.

Anyway, I somehow got stuck talking to Mr. President DB for what seemed like an eternal hell, suckered into his arrogance and cornered with nowhere to go. Unfortunately, I was drinking water, which provided no buffer against the hubris filled ramblings of the Prez and as I pretended to listen to him drone on and on and on…and on about how much money he had (vomit in my mouth), how important he was, blah, blah, blah…I had to fight to stop looking at my watch. And yawn. Again. Even when he pulled out the picture of him shirtless, I managed to suppress the eyeroll. (I need a freaking trophy for that feat!)

I told finally told him I was dating someone (which I find out, never ever works. It just makes the arrogant ones lose their semi polite gentleman filter and they then say whatever they want because they have nothing to lose) and he actually patted me and condescendingly said, “You’ll grow out of it.” (WTH?)

Then shortly thereafter, I got an email from him asking me to dinner (telling me how he had so many important people people to meet, but would still have time for me) among some other work related stuff, which was just as douchy as he was in person (ask me in person, I will show it to you). I politely declined citing work issues to which he replied, “Your loss.” Ahaha.

Yes, it’s my loss. I don’t have to spend 2 hours of my life listening to how wonderful you are. Boo.

That’s the thing with arrogance, it BLINDS the people that are so puffed up, they can’t see what an a*hole they truly are. And some girls really don’t give a crap about how much money a man has, how much land/stock/companies they own or how you look shirtless.

Men, consider this your PSA for the day. Confidence is SEXY. Arrogance is NOT. Save the BS for the guys, some girls don’t give a sh*t how important you think you are.

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Steve - January 22, 2014 - 6:25 pm

perhaps wearing a fake wedding ring can help as a deterrent.

Katie - January 22, 2014 - 11:33 am

I need to see this letter.

C O N T A C T
F A C E B O O K
T W I T T E R